“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.
It doesn’t matter how slowly you go so long as you didn’t stop! And don’t forget that life has many ways to give you what you have been asking for. Take every moment as a turning point to the change of your desire. Don’t blame the past or anyone in it for what you do today. Blaming the past is like blaming the gravity for the glass you broke. So just focus on the good qualities you have learnt those years. Never feel lost & never look back. You need a few times to show who you are.